dear my visitors and readers

do read.
do learn something from this blog.
do comment for improvement.
hontouni arigatou! :)



it was my final day at school for the internship.

my friends and i returned to college later than usual. it's about 4 p.m. already when i arrived my room.

my stomach had war inside.

it was that, i made it to go to the place i need to go.

so, i was there. with the unexpected condition. i couldn't even stand straight.

my physical state didn't allow me to join the activities.

my body had some rest on the bed.

i woke up. a sister who's a pharmacist came to me. checking on me.

"u have a high fever!"


"come... eat these bananas, then eat these pills..."


another sister who's a nurse interrupted,
"u need to take a bath too..."


i showed them a face. ~_~

i was... yeah. it's been quite a time i hadn't have a fever.

it's been quite a time i hadn't have such concern from others. touched.

thanks, sisters.

we're not related by blood, we're related by faith.

this sweet moment made my heart whispers, 'i want to taste these-kind-of-sweet-little-things in my life for-ever....'

insya Allah.

And (moreover) He hath put affection between their hearts: not if thou hadst spent all that is in the earth, couldst thou have produced that affection, but Allah hath done it: for He is Exalted in might, Wise. (8: 63) 


p/s: my writing skills rusting!


random no. 13 - pre-ramadhan version

88. father.

what happened to my classmate was that, he didn't have the opportunity to meet his father for the last time before the funeral. my friends and i learnt to prioritise our parents more than our own wants in life, whatever it is. (e.g.: we wanted to be posted far from our hometown which would not be in Peninsular of Malaysia, but our parents did not allow us to fill the states in the application form.)

before that sad event, i shared something about father's presence on Facebook. what had happened was, a sister who no longer has a father alive commented on the post. again, i learnt to not really share anything on Facebook blindly.

this year, one of my task in my happy circle was to deliver tazkirah. i chose hadith about orphans in Al-Adab. it was because that time, i came across quite number of students who no longer have a father. and i learnt that orphans; the real definition of anak yatim is for those who've lost the father who used to support the family. the leader of the family.

ummi, ayah, i hope to see you both again before this Ramadhan ends.

and i'll leave ummi ayah under Allah's guardianship just like you both leave me here in His guardianship since five years ago.

89. silaturrahim.

silaturrahim. one of the ways to preserve the tie is to do good towards everyone without hoping for a reply for the deeds. what i meant is hoping for them to do good back to us. ^_^

and, remember that, Allah hate people who cut off the tie. may Allah guide us through and through and guard us from His anger.

90. was not really prepared for Ramadhan this year. am adapting Ramadhan mood.

may Allah bless, people.

91.  So Real by Raef ft. Maher Zain.

Lyrics: Raef, Maher Zain & Bara Kherigi
Melody & Arrangement: Maher Zain
Director: Ross Ching
Producer: Don Le
Actress: Bushra Maghrabi
Dop: Gabriel Lewis
1st AD: Jon Crawford
1st AC: Michael Skor
2nd AC / DIT: Andy Chen
Gaffer: David Lassiter 
Key Grip: Raul Rivera 
Best Boy Electric: Chad Nagel
Best Boy Grip: Gabe Verdesoto
Dolly Grip for Slider: Spencer Smith
Art Director: Erin Riegel
Sand Castle Builder: Greg & Kathy Lebon / Archisand Professional Sand Sculptors, Inc
Stylist: Angelica Lee
Makeup/Hair: Eva Cortez
Key PA: Justin Vancho
PA: Sam Puefua
BTS Photo / Video: Steven Lam
Special Thanks: Line 204

So Real - Lyrics:

They say that love never lasts
That love never lives to see another day
But what I know deep down inside
It's what I feel and it's so real
I gave it up all for You
And there ain't nothing that I won't do
All I know deep down inside
It's what I feel and it's so real with You!

Allah, everyday I'll try to be as true as I can to You
'Cause loving You the best I can
Will always be my number one and only plan
Yes everyday I'll try to be as true as I can to You
'Cause loving You the best I can
Will always be my number one and only plan

They say: "You're out of your mind"
"Don't you know that love fades away?"
They say: "It only brings you pain!"
But what I feel is so real!
I gave it up and turned to You
'Cause I know what your love can do
O Allah open up our hearts
And make us feel how it's so real with You!



random no. 12

82. al-haya'. the characteristic of shy.
make sure u feel shy to Allah to feel shy because of human. i don't know if shy is literally equal to al-haya'.
my message is, doing something, check, if people see me doing this, what would i feel? ok. why should i feel that way? is there anything so wrong? is it allowed in islam? if it's syar'ie, i don't have anything to be shy or worried if people see me. :)

83. heart. feelings. why u're so uncontollable?! -_-"

84. B2. yada. the license. i've given it up. expired. the L one. so... i can't ride a bike now till Allah knows when. hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm.

85. i don't like to be the shadow. i want to be seen as me. i want to be accepted as me. i want to be known as me. i want to be recognised as me. yes. the right sentence of my discomfort is i don't like to be the shadow. i need a place that is as spacious as a field, not under a tree. and i don't want to be a shade to others, as well. because flowers bloom their best with the sun's presence even though at a shady area. (now am manipulating you! :P)

86. mission: one book read in two days. this mission is not accomplished. and i just have two weeks to go back to the campus. and i don't wanna go back to the campus. T_T final year is scary.

87. went out with my younger bro and two male cousins.
they laughed at girls who are easily shaken when boys disturbed them with sweet-lovey-dovey or show extra concern to them. -_-"
in my heart, guys, that's why u don't need to do all those things. u need to help us to take care of our heart and feelings. T_T


few words.

1. intention

2. sincere

3. proactive

4. positive

5. tadhiyah

6. brave

7. truthful

8. tawakkal

9. let it go. (LOL)

10. consistent and persistent

now, let's work.