all i need.

YOU SET ME FREE
HELPED ME TO SEE
OF EVERY GIFT YOU GAVE TO ME
YOUR LOVE IS ALL I NEED
YOUR LOVE IS ALL I NEED

(URDU)
AYE SANAM NOORI
OH MY EFFULGENT BELOVED
TUJSE KAISEE DOOREE
WHY SHOULD THERE BE A DISTANCE
JENE KO TEREE
TO LIVE ALL IS SUFFICIENT
ROSHANEE ZAROORE 

THE NEED OF YOUR LIGHT


PLEASE SHOW ME,
YOUR MERCY
YOU CAN TAKE THE STARS FROM THE SKIES ABOVE
YOU CAN TAKE THE SEAS, THE AIR I BREATHE, YOUR LOVE IS ALL I NEED
YOU CAN TAKE THE SUN, THE EARTH BENEATH, ‘CAUSE YOU’RE THE ONE I NEED
YOUR LOVE IS ALL I NEED

YOU SPOKE TO ME
GAVE ME BELIEF
SURROUNDED IN A WORLD OF GREED
YOUR LOVE IS ALL I NEED

(PERSIAN)
LAHSEHA PAYA PAY
MOMENTS, ONE AFTER ANOTHER
TAY MISHE DAMA DAM
PASS ONE BY ONE
MIRESE VAKHTE
REACHES THE TIME
DIDAR KAM KAM, DIDAR KAM KAM
TO SLOWLY MEET, TO SLOWLY MEET

PLEASE SHOW ME
YOUR MERCY
YOU CAN HAVE THE STARS FROM THE SKIES ABOVE
YOU CAN HAVE THE SEAS, THE AIR I BREATHE, YOUR LOVE IS ALL I NEED
TAKE AWAY THE SUN, THE EARTH BENEATH, YOUR LOVE IS ALL I NEED
YOUR LOVE IS ALL I NEED

YOU SET ME FREE
HELPED ME TO SEE
OF EVERY GIFT YOU GAVE TO ME
YOUR LOVE IS ALL I NEED
YOUR LOVE IS ALL I NEED

(TURKISH)
VURGUNUM SANA
STRUCK ON YOU
ASLA VAZGECMEM
I WOULD NEVER GIVE UP (LOVING YOU)
KALBIMDE SEN VARSIN
YOU ARE THE ONE IN MY HEART
ASKINDAN DONMEM
I CAN’T TURN AWAY FROM YOUR LOVE
ASLA TERK ETMEM
NEVER COULD I ABANDON YOU

PLEASE SHOW ME
YOUR MERCY
YOU CAN HAVE THE STARS FROM THE SKIES ABOVE
YOU CAN HAVE THE SEAS, THE AIR I BREATHE, YOUR LOVE IS ALL I NEED
YOU CAN HAVE THE SUN, THE EARTH BENEATH, YOUR LOVE IS ALL I NEED
YOUR LOVE IS ALL I NEED

PLEASE SHOW ME, YOUR MERCY
YOUR LOVE IS ALL I NEED
YOUR LOVE IS ALL I NEED
‘CAUSE YOUR LOVE IS ALL I NEED
TO BE ALL I CAN BE
AND I KNOW THAT YOU SEE
HOW MUCH YOU MEAN TO ME

Music by Sami Yusuf
English words by Will Knox & Sami Yusuf
Urdu words by Mehboob
Turkish words by M. Demirci
Persian words by Ustadh Babak Radmanesh
Produced by Sami Yusuf

june 14th.

what happened on June 14th was that, i took JPJ test for the second time in my life.

i wasn't so nervous initially. hm. this time, the test for B2.

but, all the way through taking the test, i have this BIG QUESTION in my mind,

why am i taking this?

why am i doing this?

for the D-license, i have concrete, strong and relevant reasons for taking it.

for B2, i can't find a reason that can make me feel blessed.

yada, even ummi and ayah were reluctant to give me the permission taking the license for B2. yea, i have the thought of not being blessed by them taking this one.

the test consists of two parts. i failed the part where we have to go through a bridge? okey. it's 'titi'. i was almost pass that part, but before i pass, my left leg touched the ground. there it went, this is bad.

the BIG QUESTION haunted me. it haunted me together with a frustration inside.

yeah. i know. turn to Allah. u would say, aite?

so far, the D-license have caused me to contribute so much things to people around me. and am grateful for that.

therefore, i ain't giving up for B2. i'm halfway already. i'll end it sweetly, may Allah allow it to happen. i hope, this fate of B2 with me promising me a 'useful' me in the future.

and, it's 11/08/1434. 18 or 19 days toward Ramadhan.

am saying this to my very own self,

kullu sanah wa antum ilallahi aqrab!

am older. should be wiser.


 and yet, i once wished to go for a B license. end.

and one of my beloved updated her blog, i would take her entry as a special entry for me. heee. since it's special for me, here you go, something special to be shared with you:
http://kasehtania.blogspot.com/2013/06/final-exam-sem-2-1213.html 

this path...

Aku ingat pertama kali kita bertemu,
hatiku berdesir, bergetar melebihi biasanya

Kubisikkan pelan-pelan dalam hati..
..semoga rasa ini bertahan selamanya
Hingga kelak kita berakhir di tempat yang dijanjikan Allah untuk kita

Aku ingat hari-hari berat yang kita lalui,
perdebatan-perdebatan antara siapa yg harus mengalah
Rasa kesal yang membuncah,
pun sampai rasa tidak percaya yang mulai berkuasa

Tapi semua selalu berakhir,
dengan aku yang kembali menggenggam tanganmu mesra
Sadar bahwa, hidupku tanpamu tak akan sama
Sadar bahwa, kau adalah anugrah terbaik yang bisa aku minta pada Allah

Kau yang mengubahku dari seonggok daging bergerak tak bermakna
Menjadi sebenar-benarnya manusia,
Mengajarkanku bahwa hidup ini bukan tentang AKU semata

Kau yang membantuku mengkristalkan banyak hikmah
Dibalik senyum dan nestapa, disela-sela musibah

Kau, anugrah Allah bernama Tarbiyah
Aku ingin Menua, membangun istana syurga, menghembus penghujung nyawa
Dengan kita yang tetap seperti ini, sejalan seirama :’)

credit:

http://www.pkspiyungan.org/2013/05/pks-anugerah-terindah-darinya.html

 

so, i found this piece.... 

am searching for a place for solitude, yet shooting and boosting me to be something. somebody. 

but, so far, when i asked people around me, my beloved, all of them offered me something that needs me to offer something to them. ohoh. i was like... uh-uh? 

i'm searching something for me, and others are asking something from me? that just made me to wake up. 

maybe, am too 'old' on this path to ask from others to get something for myself, in that way. 

thus, i need to be that strong. i need to be that beneficial. because there're lots of others need me. 

again, am typing the sentence here, to be strong, i need to ask from the ONE who's STRONG, ALLAH. 

inbox.

i've subscribed many many many tooo many things using my hotmail ID.
it's full now. with many useful and beneficial materials for me here and after, insya Allah.
all i need to do is to digest everything. >.<
my yahoo! inbox, full of spam e-mails. rarely be there.
yesterday i just realised there's a request for e-mail address. for my main bussiness here. i gave my gmail ID. since my gmail is still clean. hu.
hm.
i'll update about the test later, insya Allah.

i love hotmail inbox.
many things to be read. from muharikah, my little pencil, PKS Piyungan, ProductiveMuslim, TES, Wiley Library... i need to check my time used. too many time wasted in these two years, lately.

random no. 9

61.
Walau hujan badai kan terus melanda
Walau amuk gelombang tak henti menerjang
Walau terang mencegah, walau mentari kan membakar
Jangan letih menapaki kehidupan

Ujian bagaikan terik sinar sang surya...
Hadir kedunia bersama berjuta karunia...
Janganlah bertekuk lutut dalam pelukan putus asa...
janganlah bersimpuh dihadapan duka...

hadapilah segala tantangan...
sambutlah harimu dengan suka cita...
hadapilah segala ujian...
dalam kesulitan pasti ada kemudahan...

by: shoutul harokah

my credit goes to that person who just returned from 'Amman. he keeps playing this song and his alarm is this song!


62.
went to Zoo Negara with Ahmad, Muhammad and 'Ali. with my 'uniform' usually i wear at home or in personal transport. when i said i'm selekeh, that Ahmad replied, "all Islam asks to cover 'aurah..." okay! ha-ha. dush!

i found it's not interesting to go to zoo.

but, while eating ice cream with Muhammad and 'Ali before we went back, i was thinking about the zoo.

yeah. i found that actually i can do something that make me a better servant to Allah.
zoo means plenty of Allah's creatures. all the beautiful. all the cute. all the wild. all the big and tall animals! how proud was i....

and yeah. i actually should observe what's in the zoo.
children and zoo are familiar. am going to be with children, ain't i? that forgotten and proud me again...

in a conclusion, think before i feel. i've wasted my time at the zoo without doing something meaningful! :'(

and am sorry to Muhammad and 'Ali that i didn't bring my camera and didn't ask from Ahmad his camera to snap some pictures of you both! bad sister. 

63.
it's about passion. 8 hours journey. i didn't realise that it's more than two hours! :)
"weren't you afraid or scared?"
"eh? afraid? scared? of what?"
"if you took wrong road..."
"no.... we can turn around if we took wrong road..."

ngeeeeeeeeeeeee. and i'm a morning person.


64.
my lovely bluish sentimental the second was sick.
"operating system can't be found"

i was just... okay.... 

then, sent it to the place where i took it.

after returned from Selangor, it's at ayah's place.

turned it on.

huh? okey. nothing inside.  okay. restless.

no sentimental pictures.
no sentimental values.

yes, i don't have external hard disk! +.+

i was like.... it took me quite a time to get my feet back on the ground with a heart and soul.

later, this thought came into my brain.

you get it back with nothing inside. it's like purifying. doesn't it? you can restart all over again. reinstall all the good stuff for your soul. don't give a dirt into it. you should download Omar Series! Fetih! ehe. you can search again all the ebooks for your soul. won't you? still remember when you lost that Nokia? you have the pros for losing it, right? please, lighten your spirit!! you're not nothing here.


65.
MyGMJ.

cousins; E, Luq, bro in law; abe Syim, Momo, Aman

Masjid Negeri, Shah Alam

things i got... the third brooch i bought since i've lost it twice.

maybe, flashmob.. maybe. haha

credit: Ahmad's blackberry. :P


66.
today. less than 24 hours - time at home. hee. about 24 hours Junaid has gone to his hostel. i miss him. hahah. Junaid!
days with the five younger bros. growing up to be taller and bigger than me.
am losing my appetite. kohf2. it's okey. after nine days, i'll be back. insya Allah! heh.
the best excuse; i've to see the doctor!! =p


67.
school.
something i can't describe with words.
but, i really want to do something. i need to do something. regardless all the trouble i'd known.

random no. 8

55.
"let's go to Borneo at the end of this year.."

"woah.. okey.. how much do we need?"

"save about RM*** to RM***..."

"seriously? urm... insya Allah.. we'll see..."


56.
"go buy a smartphone, dear!! it's a need."

"hehe.. i will.. i will... insya Allah.."


57.
"i think i'm going to umrah at the end of this year.."

"urm... that need thousands... who do you wanna bring?"

"hm... i don't know..."


58.
"i wanna buy a smartphone, soon.."

"okay. save your money..."

"can u add some?"

"you can take from another account of yours..."

"do i have much in that account? i don't think so... hueee"

"still can be used to add some.. would be sufficient..."


59.
someone updated her status. i don't like the content of the status. since i know i'm the one who's closely related to the status, it reminded me of what had happened about eight years ago. i asked her to delete. -_- it's better that way.


60.
"what kind of book is Anthem?"

"huh? where is it?" *looking at her hand, Velvet di Durham!!!*

"in the living area.... in the Jemari Seni's plastic bag..."

"hmm... about school students..." in heart, 'sending things without notice, but sarcastic status are not nice, dude.'

Random no. 7

46. spendthrift. i am. T_T nevermind. today, ayah stopped at a shoes shop to buy new one for himself. then, i remember that i need a new pair of slipper to use for toilet business at hostel, so i went into the shop with ummi ayah and Muhammad. he. he. then, i just looked around. there is stock clearance....hehe. i took one pair of formal shoes worth RM10. haha. well, physically the shoes doesn't seem very new. well. old-stock? never mind. at the end, Muhammad bought one pair of slipper for him like my two pairs! haha.

47. today, i just found that UEFA is going to put Israel in the list. erm. i dunno how to explain this issue, but i understand the issue. if Israel got its name in the list, it seems like the world recognizes it as a country. seemed legal. the truth is Israel robbed Palestine! you may read more in inminds.com.and i was touched to see everyone beyond the race and religion are letting their voices out for Palestine.

48. speaking of Palestine, there'll be a program in this country!!

i do feel like going. but, hmmm.... we'll see. huhu. last year i couldn't join them. i can't remember why, maybe because i was in the campus. but this year, i can see the opportunity with 30% possibility. if you live near Shah Alam, just, please join the people!!

49. Closer and closer to mankind comes their Reckoning: yet they heed not and they turn away.
[Al-anbiya', 21:1]

50. today, we're waiting for Ahmad to arrive home. i was laying on the bed. trying to take a nap. "Gahh!!"
okey. he's arrived. he laughed at our home gate. use remote control everything, but rongak! haha. still can be entered by person.

51. not feeling good to update my goodreads. i think it's near 30 books already i've read. hm.

52. i told Junaid about UEFA - Israel. Junaid replied me why bother? let Israel be in the list. ummi was listening to our conversation. ummi said that Junaid doesn't understand the issue, yet. hmmm.....

53. a reply to an SMS is meaningful eventhough it's just a - :) - or just an - OK - or just a - TQ - appreciate the people sending u an SMS, furthermore if the sender have done u a favour. *me either often reluctant to reply an SMS when we know it's the end of the topic. hee.

54. bringing Muhammad and Ali to a programme... Ali as the participant. Muhammad as my little brother. Muhammad - spoiled, pampered. thanks to the brothers for their favour at the dorm.
Ali - felt threatened by Muhammad, always asked Muhammad to get out of the programme-causing Muhammad to find me with teary eyes. -_-