i wasn't so nervous initially. hm. this time, the test for B2.
but, all the way through taking the test, i have this BIG QUESTION in my mind,
why am i taking this?
why am i doing this?
for the D-license, i have concrete, strong and relevant reasons for taking it.
for B2, i can't find a reason that can make me feel blessed.
yada, even ummi and ayah were reluctant to give me the permission taking the license for B2. yea, i have the thought of not being blessed by them taking this one.
the test consists of two parts. i failed the part where we have to go through a bridge? okey. it's 'titi'. i was almost pass that part, but before i pass, my left leg touched the ground. there it went, this is bad.
the BIG QUESTION haunted me. it haunted me together with a frustration inside.
yeah. i know. turn to Allah. u would say, aite?
so far, the D-license have caused me to contribute so much things to people around me. and am grateful for that.
therefore, i ain't giving up for B2. i'm halfway already. i'll end it sweetly, may Allah allow it to happen. i hope, this fate of B2 with me promising me a 'useful' me in the future.
and, it's 11/08/1434. 18 or 19 days toward Ramadhan.
am saying this to my very own self,
kullu sanah wa antum ilallahi aqrab!am older. should be wiser.
and yet, i once wished to go for a B license. end.
and one of my beloved updated her blog, i would take her entry as a special entry for me. heee. since it's special for me, here you go, something special to be shared with you: